BEYOND ONLINE, THERE IS ALSO A BLIND DATE: I consider the idea, success rate,tips, stories, etc.*(Cont’d)”
Vol. 3, No. 5, Monday, May 7th2012
TITLE: “BEYOND ONLINE, THERE IS ALSO A BLIND DATE: I consider the idea, success rate,tips, stories, etc.* (Cont’d) ”
INTRODUCTION
This week, I will continue on with my romance theme and the blind date subject. But now, I will look at the ‘blind date’ -particularly the stories: …the good, the bad …and …..the ugly. My book of the week is The Blind Date Survival Guide: A Practical and Funny [Paperback] – Jeff Nagel (Author), Jessica Robison (Illustrator) (Editor’s Note: This is a continuation of the post from last week – part of a series on dating, relationships and marriage.)
PREVIEW: Next week, I will do my annual post on Mother’s’ Day with an update for this year. (Editor’s Note: This is another post in a continuing series on holidays and special dates.)
MY LIFE & TIMES*
Do I have any blind dating stories? I have some…several my own experiences…others from friends … and still others through research.
Very Good (VG): Here’s one far to the good. My mother was the matchmaker. She knew a man who lived in her building. He was older, looking to meet a lady in order to get married. She met this woman – her boyfriend was killed in a car accident. My mother invited them both over for coffee. They hit it off. They eventually married, had two children and were lived happily ever after. The added touch was that this gentleman bought my Mom an expensive dress to say, “Thank you”. Wasn’t that sweet?
Good: The story in the movie titled, “Sleepless in Seattle” is a fix-up story, with a twist: little boy goes looking for a girl for his Dad, finds her, brings them together and everyone lives happily ever after.
Not Good Enough: I had a fix-up. He called me every night for a week. We then went on our first date. He was really a good guy screwed on straight. He was a perfect gentleman… a really nice guy. But alas, the chemistry was not there. I had no interest. Afterwards, he called one night asking to go out again. I gracefully declined. He said that it will be an honor to stay friends and keep in touch with me. He never called back. My friends said that he was really broken up about this.
Bad #1: I remember one in particular. At first, he seemed polite and well-educated. But he showed himself to discriminate, being critical of other national origins. He was very rude, I was completely taken aback … I did not expect it. I recognized that he was an idiot… In a half hour, it was over and I walked away…good riddance!
Bad #2: Here’s another. A woman co-worker was trying to find a mate for her daughter. She went beyond matchmaking – she put an ad in a newspaper! We would hear her screening the potential dates. You see the phone number in the ad was not her daughter’s, but the mother`s at work. Apparently, she found a date for her daughter. As we heard later, the young man came to the door for her daughter and made a racial remark about her next door neighbor. He then took the daughter to McDonald’s and told her that she would have to pay her own way that evening. Needless to say, the date ended early. P.S. We were very entertained with this woman’s dating stories of her daughter.
Bad #3: He was rich and I was set up by a mutual acquaintance. He wanted to know what I did for a living” He said: “You are a real beauty.” He was full of himself. He was aggressive. He spoke of his family. Later, he drove to a lovers’ lane spot. He tried to kiss me. My body language said: “I don’t think so ” I also said: “I don’t know you …it’s the first date ” After this misstep, he then asked if he could see me again. I said: “No.”
Ugly: I was lucky…I personally did not experience anything real ugly. But I did some research. Here are a few that I found. There once was a girl who chewed with her mouth open. Her date saw much too much. Or did you hear of the guy who flirted with the waitress with his date beside him. And then there was the fellow who drank so much ….wait for it….that he had to call his mother in the middle of the meal to come pick him up from the restaurant. Indeed, there are some real horror stories out there.
THE AUTHOR: Jeff Nagel
Jeff Nagel is a New York business man. He is exploring the world of blind dates, searching the perfect date. He has credibility from impressive statistics: 137 blind dates in 16 states in the U.S. and overseas.
SERIES/COLLECTION
1989 – The Blind Date Survival Guide a Practical and Funny Guide to Meeting the Person of Your Dreams [Well, Practically Funny] (Paperback)
THE BOOK: The Blind Date Survival Guide: A Practical and Funny [Paperback] – Jeff Nagel (Author), Jessica Robison (Illustrator)
Nagel has some words of advice. He sees the blind dating as a process. He has techniques – he takes you step-by-step sharing with you many He answers the earth shaking questions: (a) “How to avoid the good night kiss.” (b) “Why meeting for dinner is the worst choice for a blind date?” (c) “Why you should never eat lobster on a blind date?” (d) “Why grandparents are the worst people to get names from?” (e) “Why health clubs are terrible places to meet people?” He also thinks that blind dates can be funny. It’s a book – it`s seems light, but I think that more information is always beneficial.
CONCLUSION
Sometime in our lives, most of us have had a date not to write home about. Most people can personally relate to these stories even the weird ones-
Personal Comments
I say:
- The risk of a bad date is always there…but you never know if it will be the start of something beautiful. And you might even have a great time.
- If you’re on a blind date and it’s not going well, end the evening as early as you can.
- I agree with my Mom. She used to say: “A person has to eat a ton of salt with a man before you know what he’s all about.” The meaning is that it takes a life time to really know a person.
The Point
It’s correct to say that you cannot succeed unless you try. This applies to blind dating.
ANTOINETTE’S TIP SHEET*
A single should:
1. Say to family, friends and acquaintances: “Find me a match!” (Add: “I won’t be mad if it doesn’t work out.” This is important as most people need a push, not wanting any flack, prefering not to get involved.
2. Get as much information as you can about your blind date.
3. Go in with no expectations
4. Dress appropriately – first impressions are important
5. Go with a positive attitude.
6. Be yourself
7. Be honest
8. Be careful; to this end,
a. Drive yourself
b. Meet at a public place
c. Drink as little alcohol as possible
d. Keep your wits about you
e. Go with your instincts – if your date doesn’t look or act right, make an excuse and get out of there without delay.
9. Start the conversation on what you know about the person and go from there.
10. Try to get to know the person.
11. Listen to the person
12. Take it really SLOW if it gets romantic.
Tell me about the date of your lifetime that ended with marriage…or, tell me about the unsuccessful date that became one of your funny stories of lifetime experiences. Either way, I want to hear about it.
And that’s my thought of the week on books, what’s yours?*
Take it out for a spin and tell me if you agree.
ALP
“Books are life; and they make life better!*”
P.S. Big News: There are big changes coming to my blog – Please stay tuned.
P.P.S. #1 I have a TWITTER page. Consider becoming a follower? Visit www.twitter.com - saveandread
P.P.S. #2 I also have a FACEBOOK page. Consider becoming a friend? Visit: www.facebook.com – Alp Save Andread – please check it out.
P.P.S. #3 I am on Linkedin. Consider becoming a connection? Visit www.linkedin.com – Antoinette La Posta
*TM/© 2012 Practitioners’ Press Inc. – All Rights Reserved.
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ANNEX I: NEED SOMETHING FURTHER? TRY AN ANECDOTE OR A QUOTE:
S & R* CHOICE ANECDOTAGE #1: Rebecca Romijn-Stamos: Hello!!
“Lucky lads who dated Rebecca Romijn-Stamos in high-school were often bemused by her father’s efforts to put them at ease. “When they used to pick me up,” she once “ (Source: Anecdotage) – http://www.anecdotage.com/index.php?aid=238)
S & R* CHOICE ANECDOTAGE #2: 20 / 20 Vision?
“At a state banquet one day, Mrs. Sargent Shriver, the wife of the US ambassador to France, found herself seated beside French president Charles de Gaulle.
Such was her affection for the man that, as the meal drew to a close, she remarked, “Mr. President, I only regret that you’re not twenty years younger and that I’m not twenty years younger.”
Some time later, Mrs. Shriver casually repeated the remark to Mme de Gaulle. “Ah, yes, Mrs. Shriver,” (Source: Anecdotage) - http://www.anecdotage.com/index.php?aid=677)
S & R* CHOICE ANECDOTAGE #3: Frankly Brilliant
“After the death of his wife in the early 1770s, Benjamin Franklin considered marrying the attractive widow of the famous philosopher Helvetius.
One day, after a long period during which his other commitments had prevented him from seeing her, she chided him for not having visited sooner. “Madam,” Franklin wisely replied, “I am waiting until the nights are longer.” (Source: Anecdotage) - http://www.anecdotage.com/index.php?aid=11036)
S & R* QUOTE #1: Dr. Seuss
“We are all a little weird and life’s a little weird, and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love.” (Source: Wisdom Quotes) – http://www.wisdomquotes.com/topics/love/)
S & R* QUOTE #2: Katharine Hepburn
“Sometimes I wonder if men and women really suit each other. Perhaps they should live next door and just visit now and then.”
(Source: Wisdom Quotes) – http://www.wisdomquotes.com/topics/love/index15.html)
S & R* QUOTE #3: – Lily Tomlin
“If love is the answer, could you rephrase the question?”
(Source: Wisdom Quotes) – http://www.wisdomquotes.com/topics/love/index18.html)
ANNEX II
SCHEDULE I
“IT WORDS FOR ME!*”
“For today, my word/phrase(s) are: “dating”;
Dating
“Dating, a form of courtship which may include any social activity undertaken by, typically, two persons with the aim of assessing each other’s suitability as a partner.” (Source: Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia) – http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dating)
SCHEDULE II
STUDY/STATISTICS
SCHEDULE III
S & R* NEWS ALERT* #1: How to grow together after the wedding by Melissa Wallace
“Planning a wedding was tough enough with differing opinions, an endless to-do list, and playing peacemaker with various family members. Now that the big day is over and you and your sweetie can finally catch your breath, you may be wondering how to make the most of the months ahead to get your marriage off to a great start.
Date night. Romanticism can get thrown out the window when you’re suddenly dealing with double the load of laundry and dirty dishes. Go on a date with your spouse at least once a week to regroup and keep that fire going.
Share a hobby. You and your spouse may already have a sport or activity you both enjoy, but if you don’t, consider looking into your community centre listings and try something new. You may discover a new love for dance, ultimate Frisbee, or wine tasting.
Appreciate each other. Say thank you often and avoid brewing resentment. Just make sure you mean it. Your spouse knows when you’re being genuine and when you’re being fake. Note: apply the same to the words, I’m sorry.
Go out with friends. Don’t forget about all the people who kept you sane the weeks before your wedding and took on your stress to give you your perfect day. Your friends will be ecstatic to see a calmer version of their friend again.
Give of yourselves. Love is a wonderful thing and it should be shared with those who don’t often feel it. Consider donating your time to volunteer at a soup kitchen or share your talents at a seniors home. Or sponsor a child through an international development organization like Christian Children’s Fund of Canada. Through sponsorship, you and your spouse can write letters to a child living in poverty to show that you care.”www.newscanada.com
S & R* NEWS ALERT* #2: Want your partner to pop the question? Fix your finances first
“There’s no denying it: wedding season is in full bloom. But if you want your own happily ever after in the near future, you may want to check your personal finances first. According to a recent poll from TD Canada Trust, 77% of Canadians say they would not marry someone who was bad at managing their personal finances or if they held excessive debt.
TD Canada Trust offers advice to Canadians in relationships who are ready to take the next step:
Honesty is the best policy: Being open and honest is an important part of establishing a healthy financial foundation. If you’re saving for a down payment on a home but your partner is thinking about their next spending spree, you might be headed for some challenges. Although it can be difficult to open up about your finances, doing so can prevent big headaches down the road.
Create a plan, together: Once you’ve discussed what both parties bring to the table financially, make a plan of action, together. There can be benefits to pooling your assets, like helping each other service existing debts or lowering your household’s overall tax burden. Speak with a financial advisor who can help you create a tailored plan that works for both of you.
Retain some financial independence: While it can be worthwhile to combine finances, it is important to have individual financial goals outside of those you have as a couple. For instance, having a credit card and bills in your own name that you pay back in full and on time will help build your personal credit rating. Similarly, saving regularly through contributions from your paycheque into a Tax Free Savings Account (TFSA) or your RRSP will help you build a healthy nest egg for your future together.” www.newscanada.com
*TM/© 2012 Practitioners’ Press Inc. – All Rights Reserved
