Archive for June, 2011


Vol. 2,  No. 8, June 26, 2011



My topic this week is older men and younger women in love relationships. My book of the week is: “Dating the Older Man: Consider Your Differences and Decide if He’s Right for You” [Paperback] by Belisa Vranich Psy.D. (Author), Laura Grashow Psy.D. (Author) (Editor’s Note: This is the second of a series on dating. For the first, look up the blog from last week.)


Personally, I have never been in a relationship with a MUCH OLDER man.  But occasionally, once unattached, I have been approached by a man 15+ years my senior. I wasn’t interested. You see it was like he was on AM and I was on FM. Let me put it this way: he was talking about retirement and “Mellow Yellow”; and I was thinking about living life and “Raining Men!”  I couldn’t relate to them. I rebuffed each of them politely, but firmly.

I also have a little story. There was a couple in their 40s whom I knew. The man left his wife for a woman much younger – she was about 20. His wife took it very hard.  Nothing could change his mind – he was madly in love. The young woman stayed 10 years and then left him.  He was devastated.  He became ill with sorrow.  In the meantime, the ex-wife made a new life for herself and met someone her age. Still with him, apparently … she’s very happy. 

I recently watched the movie, titled, “An Education.” It is a chick flick set in the U.K. with a flip! There was a 16-year old high school girl, dreaming of playing cello and going to university (Cambridge).  A dashing gentleman, a lot older, then drove his fancy car into her life. Her parents struggled.  After a whirlwind  couple of dates, he took her to a whole new level. She started circulating with his friends – living the life of an older woman.  I saw her being robbed of the experiences that young people her age would normally have. But in the end, this 16 year-old did come back to earth.  

Oh by the way, while driving home one evening, there was talk on the radio about surveys on younger women & older men.  A young lady called in and told her mother’s story. At the age of 30, her Mom  married a 50 year old.  Now that he is 70 years old and she is only 50, they no longer get along. In the daughter’s expression, he was a “Grumpy Old Man”. You see…. at a certain age, the number does make a difference!

S & R* CHOICE ANECDOTAGE #1: Walter Matthau –  Sex Talk
Matthau once attributed his self-professed preoccupation with sex to his advancing age. “I figure if I’m going to die soon,” he declared, “I might as well talk about an interesting subject.”
(Source: –

S & R* CHOICE ANECDOTAGE #2: Sophia Loren – Quickie Wedding
“Loren had been involved with Carlo Ponti for years and desperately wanted to marry him. But, while he insisted that his marriage to Giuliana Fiastri was long since over, he did not divorce her (in fact, divorce was illegal in Italy which would have made it extraordinarily difficult for him to leave Fiastri). “That was the situation when Loren found herself in the wilds of Spain with the gentlemanly Cary Grant. Then 51 and on his failing third marriage to actress Betsy Drake, Grant fell hard for Loren. The 22-year-old, though still in love with Pond, reciprocated and the smitten star requested thatLoren play opposite him in his next big movie, Houseboat, giving her a major break. Ponti could hardly fail to notice. “Afraid of losing his protege, Ponti arranged for a quick Mexican divorce and a proxy marriage to Loren while she was filming Houseboat. The new Mrs. Pond now had what she wanted, but she didn’t even know that her wedding had
taken place until she read about it in Louella Parsons’ newspaper column. Unfortunately, Cary Grant read the same column, just before reporting for the day’s filming. ‘I hope you’ll be very happy,’ he said grimly. The two then proceeded to film Houseboat’s ending, an opulent wedding ceremony, with Loren a vision in a gown of antique white silk.”
(Source: –

S & R* CHOICE ANECDOTAGE #3: Sophia Loren – Queen of the Sea
“[In 1949] although she was technically too young to enter, [Sophia Loren’s mother] Villani signed Sophia up for the ‘Queen of the Sea’ beauty pageant. She lacked the right clothes, but her resourceful grandmother turned the pink living room drapes into a formal gown and sprayed whitewash on her worn-out black shoes. She didn’t win first prize (a screen test in Rome), but as one of 12 princesses, Sophia did receive prizes, including eight rolls of wallpaper that still adorn the family apartment.”
(Source: –

S & R* QUOTE #1: Hafiz of Persia
We arePeople who need to love, becauseLove is the soul’s life, Love is simply creation’s greatest joy.
(Source: Wisdom Quotes) –

S & R* QUOTE #2: Richard Bach
True love stories never have endings.
(Source: Wisdom Quotes) –

S & R* QUOTE #3: Audre Lorde
Each time you love, love as deeply as if it were forever / Only, nothing is eternal.
(Source: Wisdom Quotes) –

S & R* QUOTE #4: Madame de Stael
Love is the whole history of a woman’s life, it is but an episode in a man’s.
(Source: Wisdom Quotes) –

THE AUTHOR: Belisa Vranich Psy.D. (Author), Laura Grashow Psy.D. (Author)

Belisa Vranich Psy.D. (Author)
Vranich is a clinical psychologist She has a private practice in New York City. She believes in treatment that integrates spirituality, physical health, and relationships. She writes the “Dear Doctor” column for The New York Daily News. She is also an author and public speaker. She is single.
Laura Grashow Psy.D. (Author)
Grashow Psy.D. is a licensed psychologist. She practices in South Florida. One of her specialties is relationship issues and divorce. She is intent on fostering positive change in their lives. She has done clinical presentations to the New Jersey Psychological Association and the New York City Board of Education.

Books by Belisa Vranich Psy.D.
Some books by Vranich are:

  • He’s Got Potential: A Field Guide to Shy Guys
  • Bad Boys, Intellectuals, Cheaters, and Everything in Between
  • Boys Lie: How Not to Get Played, a sexual and emotional well-being book for teens.
  • Get a Grip: Your Two-Week Mental Makeover
  • Dating the Older Man
  • The Seven Beliefs: A Step-by-Step Guide to Help Latinas Recognize and Overcome Depression.

THE BOOK: “Dating the Older Man: Consider Your Differences and Decide if He’s Right for You” [Paperback] by Belisa Vranich Psy.D. (Author), Laura Grashow Psy.D. (Author)

Apparently, 12 million women have found love and happiness with an older man. This is a guide book. Questions are answered. Real life compliments the theory; there is an “In her words” segment. The chapters unashamedly deal with the BIG issues; several are titled: 1) Are you ready for an older man? 2) Older man  traits 3) Friend and foes 4)  Meet the family… 8) His medicine cabinet 9) Is he ready for marriage: don’t count on it., etc.  One of the points made is that stats show men are living longer and are more youthful; the result is that women in their 20s, 30s and 40s are expanding  their “date span” range to include older men. This book is a good resource for those interested in this topic. The authors speak to women interested in older men with the message:  You are not alone and you can be happy. Although, I have great reservations, more knowledge is always good.  


The situation of an older man and a younger woman in a love relationship could be…is …will  probably be a problem.

My Personal Comments

Younger women, who date older men, will argue that men their age are immature and older men are mature. Strangely, during my hunt for Mr. Right, I can honestly say that I’ve met older men who were immature. 

Is the situation of older men and younger women in love relationships more accepted than the reverse? Yes, I think so. It could be explained perhaps by the fact that in most relationships generally, the man is usually older than the woman. But it is also true that the number of years is not really defined. Also, in some cultures, women are subservient.

The Point

There is a big age gap in the situation of an older male and a younger female in a love relationship. They are at different stages in their lives. This is an important factor impacting upon future happiness.

I encourage you to:
Older men
1. Be aware why a younger woman wants to date you. There are a few key reasons. Here are mine:
(a) There is the financial aspect – you will (i). Take care of her;  (ii). Spoil her; (iii). Provide stability and security; Indeed, money does talk!
(b) She is looking for a father-figure – you are it; be prepared to be mistaken for her Dad. (Indeed, Father’s day will have a brand new meaning.)
(c) You are more worldly …been there …done that; you will show her much! Once shown, what then? 
2. Don’t go there if you’re looking for a lasting relationship;

Younger women
3. Don’t rush it; a young girl should be doing the things age appropriate for her age group.
4. Think twice about entering a love relationship between an older male and a younger female; in many instances, the relationship won’t last; 
5. Be aware why an older man wants to date you. There are a few key reasons. Here are mine:  He wants:
(a) a lot of sex;
(b)  a show piece;
(c) to feel young; in most cases, the man is insecure and needs a boost. To all of the young women out there, I ask: “Hearing this, is your older fella still a good candidate? Is it satisfying for you to be a bimbo on his arm, a play thing whose function is also to rejuvenate an oldster?      
6. Recognize:
(a) That he is at a different stage in his life than you – this could become a HUGE issue at some point later;
(b) That chances are, as the years pass, you will grow up emotionally;
(c) That once mature, you could outgrow the fantasy and see him differently;
(d) That you might tire of the realtionship: you – wanting to go to the clubs to drink and dance, he wanting to stay home to sit on the couch and watch TV.
(e) That you will then notice men your own age or younger and then move on. 
To you all of you young women out there from Venus interested in an older man, forget, “Men are from Mars” – the old guy is from deep space: … Pluto!

Take it out for a spin and tell me if you agree.

And that’s my thought of the week on books, what’s yours? *
“Books are life; and they make life better!*”
-Web Tech:

The above is a new media production of Valente under its “United Author*” program.

*TM/© 2011 Practitioners’ Press Inc. – All Rights Reserved.
Schedule I
For today, my word/phrase(s) are: “age disparity”; “old geezer”; “”; etc.
Age disparity in sexual relationships.
Age disparity in its most typical form is related to the social and economic traits of societies in relation to marriage practices, even when the sexual relationship is not directly related to marriage. A second common trait in sexual age disparity is the presence of non-durable monogamy or divorce.
(Source: Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia) –
Geezer is a term for a man. It can carry either the connotation of age and eccentricity or, in the UK, that of self-education such as craftiness or stylishness.
(Source: Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia) –

Schedule II
Single life

Percentage of unmarried and single Americans 18 and older who are women.

Number of unmarried men 18 and older for every 100 unmarried women in the United States.

15 million
Number of unmarried and single Americans 65 and older. These older Americans comprise 16 percent of all unmarried and single people 18 and older.
(Source: U.S. Census Bureau) –

Schedule III

S & R* BONUS FACT * #1: Hugh Hefner, 85, and Crystal Harris, 24, 
Crystal Harris is an American model, singer and Playmate. She was the Playboy Playmate of the Month for December 2009.[2] On December 24, 2010, she became engaged to Hugh Hefner (then age 84), to become his third wife.[3] Harris broke off the engagement on June 14, 2011, just five days before their planned wedding.[4] – Born April 29, 1986 (1986-04-29) (age 25)
(Source: Wikipedia the free encyclopedia) –

*TM/© 2011 Practitioners’ Press Inc. – All Rights Reserved.

Posted by on June 26th, 2011 Comments Off on “OLDER MAN & YOUNGER WOMAN IN LOVE RELATIONSHIP: I give you Beauty and the OLD Geezer*”

OLDER WOMEN DATING YOUNGER MEN: If thinking about a relationship, I say think again!*”

Vol. 2,  No. 7, June 19, 2011

TITLE: “OLDER WOMEN DATING YOUNGER MEN: If thinking about a relationship, I say think again!*”


This week, my topic is older women dating younger men and those in love relationships. ‘Cougars’ is the slang name given to these women.  Accordingly to statistics, it’s on the rise. My book of the week is: “Cougar: A Guide for Older Women Dating Younger Men [Paperback] by Valerie Gibson (Author). (Editor’s Note: This is the first of a series on dating. Look for the second next week.)


After my divorce, I considered dating younger men because many who approached me were younger. Numerous men my age are interested in women 20+ years younger.  However, I wanted a lasting relationship with a man of my age…someone with whom, I could grow old.  I was looking for someone who was at the same stage in his life.  I found him.

I remember being at a single’s dance and a woman came to sit at my table.  She appeared so sad; I decided to ask her what’s wrong.   Her story was that she had a long relationship with a younger man.  Everything seemed fine until one day at breakfast, he told her that he was leaving.  He said: ” You don’t suit me anymore”. I also had another friend, who would only date younger men – it was her preference.  However, her love life did not work out very well.

You remember:  Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher. Susan Sarandon and Tim Robbins, to name a few couples of the December-May sort.

S & R* CHOICE ANECDOTAGE #1: Sensitive Snipes

“Older women, they love Waiting to Exhale,” Wesley Snipes once remarked. “I had one ask me today, ‘Why did your character act like that? Because you were so sensitive, and you were feeling for the woman, right?’ And I’m, like, ‘What are you talking about? I was trying to get some ass!’ If I had a chance to read the script before I got to the set, there would’ve been a rewrite!”
(Source: –

S & R* CHOICE ANECDOTAGE #2: Oneida Corp.

“A chief tenet of John Humphrey Noyes’s utopianism held that the pleasures of sex and the bearing of children were events that might be separated in the interests of his community, which was called Oneida and located in New York State. Withholding of male orgasm would satisfy the tenet. Older women of Oneida initiated boys into the art of coitus reservatus and older men instructed the young women. Carefully chosen couples were permitted to have children, who then were raised by the community instead of by the parents, in the manner proposed by Plato. This religious society of ‘perfectionists’ was established in 1848. It prospered economically by making steel traps and silverware. It was reorganized in 1881 as a joint stock company and the social experiments were abandoned.”
(Source: –

S & R* QUOTE #1: Erma Bombeck

“We’ve got a generation now who were born with semiequality. They don’t know how it was before, so they think, this isn’t too bad. We’re working. We have our attache’ cases and our three piece suits. I get very disgusted with the younger generation of women. We had a torch to pass, and they are just sitting there. They don’t realize it can be taken away. Things are going to have to get worse before they join in fighting the battle.”
(Source: Wisdom Quotes) –

S & R* QUOTE #2: Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis

“I am a woman above everything else.”
(Source: Wisdom Quotes) –

S & R* QUOTE #3: Sarah Grimke

“It would be as wise to set up an accomplished lawyer to saw wood as a business as to condemn an educated and sensible woman to spend all her time boiling potatoes and patching old garments. Yet this is the lot of many a one who incessantly stitches and boils and bakes, compelled to thrust back out of sight the aspirations which fill her soul.”
(Source: Wisdom Quotes) –

S & R* QUOTE #4: Harriet Beecher Stowe

“So much has been said and sung of beautiful young girls, why don’t somebody wake up to the beauty of old women?”
(Source: Wisdom Quotes) –

THE AUTHOR: Valerie Gibson

For 12 years, Valerie Gibson had a sex and relationships column in the Toronto Sun newspaper (Toronto, Canada). She has been interviewed and appeared as a guest in many U.S. and Canadian programs. For two years, she starred in the  ‘Dear Valerie” show on Rogers TV. She is also an author. She says that “she loves to help men and women enjoy and understand the single life, no matter what their age.” She’s had five husbands in the last 14 years!
(Source: 123 people  ) –

Here are a few books by Valerie Gibson:

  • Cougar: A Guide for Older Women Dating Younger Men [Paperback]
  • Women and Tampons: Index of New Information, With Authors and Subjects [Paperback]
  • Younger Men: How to Find Them, Date Them, Mate Them, and Marry Them by Valerie Gibson (Feb 1994)

THE BOOK: Cougar: A Guide for Older Women Dating Younger Men [Paperback] by Valerie Gibson

Gibson has done it this time! She pushed the envelope all the way from the little girls room to the FANCY ladies room. She  recommends the dating of younger men. This is not for the prim and proper. More so, it is for the hot and spicy. If you’re mature and single, sexy and a pinch of racy, she figuratively, asks: “Why don’t you come onto the wild side.” In her view, if you’re ALL-woman, an older man is too tame for you – you need a younger fella. She says bring it on – she has many suggestions. 

Gibson admits that being with a younger man is ‘raise-your-eye-brows’ noticeable. But according to her, it will spike up your life  and super-charge your fun and times with the opposite sex. The book is somewhat balanced as it also speaks of some of the negatives, like meeting his mother!

If so inclined, Gibson’s book delivers! However, for me, it glorifies something different, but …not necessarily good.


There are women out there … dating, looking to connect with Mr. Right. There are men out there … dating, looking to connect with Ms Right.  Studies show that one-third of relationships are older women with younger men and this is on the rise. Although, there are some women who think that it is great to date younger men -I don’t. Like most of you out there, I used to believe that a man, a little older or the same age, is a proper candidate in love. I still do!

Personal Comments

I see  a cougar HOTTIE, as a 40 or 50 something, having broken the glass ceiling, now with the big job, wearing the power suit and having the all- mighty dollar.  She thinks that dating the conventional way is not for her. She sees herself  as a lioness, a natural aggressor and hunter. The toy boy is her prey. She will hunt him down, spend money on him, dress him up and have him escort her to dinner. And she will have her party time for two when she is free and so inclined. To “robbing the cradle” jokes, she will give the finger.

I see an older woman dating a younger man as a little like the dating adventures of “Thelma and Louise”. I don’t believe that these relationships are healthy for the woman.  The competition with younger women, the constant obsession with looking younger and the continual reminder of the age difference can be exhausting and depressing. (I don’t want to worry about wrinkles, competing with younger women or trying hard to keep my man. I want to be at peace and enjoy every stage of my life with the right partner.) Like the mother that I am, I would ask two  questions: (a) “Are these everlasting?” (To your “Yes”, my response would be:  “probably not”.)  (b) “Are you truly happy?” (To your “Yes”, my answer would be:  “while you might think that you are happy, I might say that you probably are settling for half a loaf.” 

You might say: “The ‘fun & games” are incredible! I probably still won’t be convinced.

An older woman dating a younger man turns dating on its ear. It is different, but does it really work? I don’t think so!

The Point

I want to save you some grief. I don’t want you to waste your time. I want you to find love in the right places.

Ladies, please:  
1. Fight the urge to flaunt it if you’ve got it;
2. Be aware of the reasons why a younger man may want a relationship with an older women; here are mine:

2.1 She is more mature, interesting, mysterious, not clingy and secure in her own skin; 

2.2 She is a pseudo-mother figure; 

2.3 She is attractive, but also, more importantly, with career, independent and financially stable or better; etc. 

2.4  He is living the dream – while old enough to know better, he is acting like an oversexed teenager;
2.5 He probably will score;
2.6 Inexperienced or shy, she will show him the way to the promised land! 
3. Leave asap, if you are with a younger man and the relationship makes you feel insecure; I submit that the age gap makes it a lot harder to achieve a sound relationship. 

4. Recognize the probability that he will leave when the bloom comes off the rose and he gets older; or the possibility that he will remain, be verbally indifferent and stray!
5. Remember when you are 60, he will be 50 or better; ask yourself if you REALLY think that he will then WANT to stay;
6. Be aware of the age perspective under which you live your life and with which you view the people in it; it is the same for him but at a different vantage point!
7. Look for someone in your age group;  I say: (a)  That one of the factors to having a successful relationship is to be with a partner with whom you have a lot in common; (b) That this means a person close to your age – it eliminates much of the differences;

8. Aspire for true love! and
9. Experience a wonderful relationship that endures.

Psst! I remember reading a funny line  in one of my e-mails.  A man leaves his wife for a young girl of 20.  His wife later finds a 20 -year old toy boy.  The 60 year old wife writes her husband a letter.  In it, she writes: “Remember 60 doesn’t go into 20, but 20 goes into 60 three times!”

For me, being with someone 50% of your age probnably will equal 50% or less the satisfaction. Think about this before jumping in with both feet!
Take it out for a spin and tell me if you agree.

And that’s my thought of the week on books, what’s yours? *
“Books are life; and they make life better!*”
-Web Tech:

The above is a new media production of Valente under its “United Author*” program.

*TM/© 2011 Practitioners’ Press Inc. – All Rights Reserved.

For today, my word/phrase(s) are: “age disparity”; “cougar”; “”; etc.

Age disparity in sexual relationships.

“Age disparity in its most typical form is related to the social and economic traits of societies in relation to marriage practices, even when the sexual relationship is not directly related to marriage. A second common trait in sexual age disparity is the presence of non-durable monogamy or divorce.”
(Source: Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia) –


“The cougar (Puma concolor), also known as puma, mountain lion, mountain cat, catamount or panther, depending on the region, is a mammal of the family Felidae, native to the Americas. This large, solitary cat has the greatest range of any large wild terrestrial mammal in the Western Hemisphere,[3] extending from Yukon in Canada to the southern Andes of South America. An adaptable, generalist species, the cougar is found in every major American habitat type. It is the second heaviest cat in the Western Hemisphere, after the jaguar. Although large, the cougar is most closely related to smaller felines and is closer genetically to the Domestic cat than to true lions.”
(Source: Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia) –

S & R* BONUS FACT * #1: Advice for Women

“In 1995 the book The Rules appeared. Columnist Maureen Dowd described it as a “dating bible” encouraging women to play “prefeminist mind games” such as “don’t stay on the phone for more than 10 minutes” and “when you’re with a man you like, be quiet and mysterious, act ladylike, cross your legs and smile” and to appear “busy and important.”[65] Women can return to “hunting their quarry” but women are advised to play elaborate games to make men think that the men are the hunters when they’re not.[66] British writer Kira Cochrane of The Guardian found the book The Rules to be confining since it urged women to “laugh at all their date’s jokes”, never ask a man to dance, and appear “challenging” since “men are born to respond to challenge.”[67] Cochrane’s problems with rules were that they relied on “objectionable, outdated notions of masculinity and femininity” and urge people to suppress their gut instinct, and they “make a game and a chore out of something that should be natural and fun and overwhelming.”[16] But writer Bibi van der Zee, initially skeptical of the advice, tried it and found it made the men she dated “keener” to keep going out with her; she found herself to be “calm, unflappable” and, based on the advice, she would leave early on a date, appear busy, not phone him back.[68] While she worried about appearing to be a “game-playing bitch”, she was surprised that the strategy worked; she married and became known to her friends as The Rules Girl.[68]”
(Source: Wikipedia the free encyclopedia) –

S & R* BONUS FACT * #2: Agenda for women

“Heterosexual women often seek well-educated men who are their age or older with high-paying jobs, according to one account.[40] Evolutionary psychology suggests that “women are the choosier of the genders” since “reproduction is a much larger investment for women” who have “more to lose by making bad choices.”[44] Educated women in many countries including Italy and Russia and the United States often find it difficult to have a career as well as raise a family; many delay finding a mate and having children and wonder if they’re too accomplished that they won’t be as appealing to men.[42] Writer Danielle Crittenden in her book What Our Mothers Didn’t Tell Us argued that having both a career and family was taxing and stressful for women, and she made a case that the ideal path for women was to marry early in their twenties when their relative beauty permitted them to find a solid marriage bargain and choose from a large pool of available men, have children, and return to the work world when they were in their early thirties with kids in school; but Crittenden agrees splitting up the career path with a ten year baby-raising hiatus poses difficulties as well.[45] Columnist Maureen Dowd quoted comedian Bill Maher on the subject of differing dating agendas between men and women: “Women get in relationships because they want somebody to talk to — men want women to shut up.”[46] Dowd recounted her mother giving her books which advised women to think of themselves as “a soft mysterious cat” and that men are attracted to “curls”, “ribbons”, “bright colors”, and women should “avoid sarcasm.”[47] Dowd quoted poet Dorothy Parker on the subject of romance:”
(Source: Wikipedia the free encyclopedia) –

“In cultures where age offers social advantages to one gender—typically men—partner choice usually depends primarily on a sort of Nash equilibrium across ages and sexes.[citation needed] For older, established men, the first choice is for younger, more attractive women.[1] In polygamous cultures—such as many Australian aboriginal populations—older wives are maintained as well until the husband dies.[citation needed] Typically, older widows are married to younger men who have come of age first.[citation needed]”
(Source: Wikipedia the free encyclopedia) –



“A study released in 2003 by the United Kingdom’s Office for National Statistics concluded that the proportion of women in England and Wales marrying younger men rose from 15% to 26% between 1963 and 1998.[5]In August 2010, Dr. Michael Dunn of the University of Wales Institute, Cardiff completed and released the results of a study on age disparity in dating. Dr. Dunn concluded that “Not once across all ages and countries…did females show a preference for males significantly younger than male preferences for females” and that there was a “consistent cross-cultural preference by women for at least same-age or significantly older men.” A 2003 AARP study had previously brought results that 34% of forty-year and older women were dating younger men.[6]”
(Source: Wikipedia the free encyclopedia) –

“In August 2010, Dr. Michael Dunn of the University of Wales Institute, Cardiff completed and released the results of a study on age disparity in dating. Dr. Dunn concluded that “Not once across all ages and countries…did females show a preference for males significantly younger than male preferences for females” and that there was a “consistent cross-cultural preference by women for at least same-age or significantly older men.” A 2003 AARP study had previously brought results that 34% of forty-year and older women were dating younger men.[6]”
(Source: Wikipedia the free encyclopedia) –

Another stat is almost one-third of women between the ages 40 and 69 are dating younger men (defined as 10 or more years younger). And according to a recent AARP poll, one-sixth of women in their 50s, in fact, prefer men in their 40s.


S & R* NEWS ALERT* #1: Top priorities for Canadian women

“(NC)—Whether young or old, single or have a family, women’s priorities will change at throughout life’s many stages. To determine the importance women place on their health and areas that Shoppers Drug Mart can help women achieve their health goals, the company commissioned a national survey of women through Northstar Research Partners and Strategic Navigator. The study found that overwhelmingly, women identify health as their number one priority in life, with financial stability trailing behind. However, a large number of women, 42 per cent, rank the health of their family as the most important priority in life– more important than their own health.

Based on these results, some women might not be taking all of the time they need and deserve to ensure they are achieving optimal health. If you are someone whose health is taking a back seat, then it might be time to take back “me” time and try to focus on finding ways to incorporate your own health as a daily priority. Start by joining a running or walking group that meets a couple of times a week. It is great exercise, and will also provide you with an opportunity to get to know others who are focused on achieving good health, which the survey also found was an important factor in helping women motivate their own healthy living goals.

It is important to take a holistic approach to health, including mind, body and spirit. The survey found that 62% of women associate making a meaningful contribution to the world with health in spirit. So signing up for a charitable walk, like the Weekend to End Women’s Cancers, is a great way to achieve optimal health. Walking or running in the fresh air will help clear your mind, regain focus, reduce stress and help you get in shape – all while giving back and helping other women achieve greater health.”

Posted by on June 19th, 2011 Comments Off on OLDER WOMEN DATING YOUNGER MEN: If thinking about a relationship, I say think again!*”

SAVE AND READ* PREVIEW/PROMO: older women & young men in love relationships?*

Hello all. I’m thinking about the BAD and the good in older women & young men in love relationships. Yea, I mean cougar women. This is the subject of my blog post this Sunday June 19 2011 at 9:45PM at
Agree or disagree …why don’t you tell me!

*TM/© 2011 Practitioners’ Press Inc. – All Rights Reserved.

Posted by on June 18th, 2011 Comments Off on SAVE AND READ* PREVIEW/PROMO: older women & young men in love relationships?*

“BRIDE’S WEDDING PLANNING/ PLANNER: I give you motherly advice, how-to, dos and don’ts

Vol. 2,  No. 6, June 12, 2011

TITLE: “BRIDE’S WEDDING PLANNING/ PLANNER: I give you motherly advice, how-to, dos and don’ts (Check this out first on getting engaged!)*”


It’s here – the month of June and you know what that means – weddings. I got me to thinking about…., you guessed it – brides to be.  My books of the week, (there is a bonus book) are: #1 “The Royal Wedding for Dummies” by Julian Knight plus #2 “PassPorter’s Disney Weddings and Honeymoons: Dream Days at Disney World and on Disney Cruises” [Paperback] by Carrie Hayward. My topic of the week is brides and all things wedding.


I was a bride to be, a bride on her weddng day, a guest at numerous weddings and also a mother of the bride. So you see, I can say:  Been there …done that. As a result, I speak from experience.

Bride to be

I was a KID  …only 20. I was both nervous and also VERY excited. The preparations were so overwhelming. I  couldn’t really enjoy the pleasures. This was due to the pressure to get everything JUST right. This meant the right hall and band. Conflicts – there were a few, but nothing that didn’t get resolved quickly. Shopping for the wedding dress was a dream come true. It was quality time with my mother.  The dress was lovely – a traditional gown: definitely starch white, long-sleeves and high neck. I spent hours with my girl friends reading bridal magazines and discussing what made a perfect wedding. As my maid of honour, I asked my best friend – we were school mates. She said: “Yes.” I also chose a few bridesmaids. The days ticked down quickly – last minute details arose. Then the rehearsal day arrived. My excitement heightened.  


The big day finally arrived: it was sunny with a clear blue sky. I was in a daze. I was SOOOOOOO busy! I had my hair done in the morning.  I did my own makeup. And then came the dress. It is an Italian tradition to have a pre-ceremony house celebration, one in the home of the bride for her family (and one in the home of the groom, for his family.)  My house was decorated with white ribbons and flowers, interior and exterior. All put together in my gown, I was living the dream in all of my splendor, with the photographer taking pictures.  I was the recipient of compliments from those close and dear, who were there – everybody was all dressed in their ‘Sunday best – all primped up. There were people from out of town: Toronto, etc. There were hors d’oeuvres: panninis, pizza slices, olives, cheese, fruit, champagne with orange juice, sweet cakes, etc. The limousine then arrived. I was whisked away to the Church. I was escorted by my wonderful Dad down the aisle. We were supposed to go to the botanical gardens for picture taking, but because my eyes were tearing and I couldn’t keep them open, the photographer had all of us come to his studio. The reception was big, 300 plus, the hall, i.e., RIZZO was fancy, the meal – more courses than you could count and the party – great fun. It just flew by.  I was excited about starting a new life, but sad, leaving the home of my parents.

Mother of the bride

My eldest daughter and her fiancé decided to plan their own wedding. (They did a great job) . They had a certain reception hall in mind. It was booked a year and a half in advance and yet they couldn’t reserve the date, which they wanted.  Italian reception halls are known for beautiful décor and exceptional catering. This makes the planning much easier.  The search for the right wedding gown was another story all together – it took a while.  Ironically, she bought the first dress that she had wanted. It was purchased 6-8 months in advance.
The wedding was a big success.  Everything went as planned, luckily even the weather cooperated.  Although fatigued on the wedding day, we were thrilled that the ceremony and reception was such a smash hit.  Our family and friends talked about it for days. It is a supremely sweet memory!

Future mother of the bride

I am so looking forward to seeing my younger daughter walking down the aisle on her wedding day. She will be such a beautiful bride; and I am certain that the ceremony and reception shall be exceptional.   

S & R* CHOICE ANECDOTE #1: Elizabeth Taylor: Many Weddings
During one of her many weddings, Elizabeth Taylor was asked by a presiding official to enumerate her previous husbands. “What is this,” Taylor replied, “a memory test?”
(Source: –

S & R* CHOICE ANECDOTE #2: Ice Queen
“Prince Michael Golitsyn of Russia had taken an Italian Catholic wife, to the intense displeasure of Czarina Anna Ivanovna. Although the prince’s bride soon died, the czarina remained bent on punishing him. She had a vendetta against the prince and his family, who opposed her rule; she also had a vicious sense of humor. “She ordered an ice palace built in St. Petersburg in the winter of 1739, completely outfitted with ice furnishings – dishes, toilets, tables, even a four poster ice bed. When all was finished, she selected the ugliest woman she could find to be the prince’s second bride and forced the couple to parade about town on an elephant before the wedding. Accompanying them was a procession of freaks. “The procession made its way to the ice palace, where ‘the Bridal Pair of Fools’ were stripped and sent to their icy nuptial chamber. Then all exits were sealed. The couple survived the frigid night, and nine months later, the prince’s wife gave birth to twins.”
(Source: –

S & R* CHOICE ANECDOTE #3:Madonna’s Wedding
During their wedding in December 2000, Madonna and Guy Ritchie were given an unusual gift by the Reverend Susan Brown, the Scottish minister who presided over the ceremony at the Church of Scotland’s cathedral in Dornoch, Scotland. The gift? A twin-pack of toilet paper. “There are two rolls together,” she later explained, “just like the couple. And the toilet paper is soft, gentle, long and strong – which is what I hope their marriage will be.”
(Source: –

S & R* QUOTE #1: Julia Child
The secret of a happy marriage is finding the right person. You know they’re right if you love to be with them all of the time.
(Source: Wisdom Quotes) –

S & R* QUOTE #2: Marilyn Monroe
Before marriage, a girl has to make love to a man to hold him. After marriage, she has to hold him to make love to him.
(Source: Wisdom Quotes) –

S & R* QUOTE #3: Mignon McLaughlin
A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.
(Source: Wisdom Quotes) –

S & R* QUOTE #4: Simone Signoret
Chains do not hold a marriage together. It is threads, hundreds of tiny threads which sew people together through the years. That is what makes a marriage last –more than passion or even sex!
(Source: Wisdom Quotes) –


THE AUTHOR: Julian Knight

Julian Knight is a writer. He wrote pieces for magazines, newspapers, etc. He was a reporter at the BBC. He was a sectional editor in the last few years. For him, the impending Royal Wedding was big news  – it became his book, published in 2011. 

He is the author of:

  • British Politics For Dummies
  • British Citizenship Test For Dummies

THE BOOK: “The Royal Wedding for Dummies” by Julian Knight

The book is about – who else: Prince William and Katherine (Kate) Middleton – for me, they are the couple of the year. (A short bio is included.) The Royal Wedding was set for April 29th, 2011 at 11:00 A.M. The book comprises Who’s-Who reference material to figure out attendees. There is also guidebook like content on food, etc. to hold your local party to celebrate the London festivities. But the big attraction is about the nuptials.   

Imagine a wedding with an unlimited budget on the world stage with all of the hype, pomp and circumstance.  The chapters comprise: 1) The Background; 2) The Wedding; 3) Taking Part in the Festivities; and 4) The Part of Tens.  This book has all the information that you want and need and more. You want customs, rules of etiquette, and history – it has it!  You want to know about Westminster Abbey … it is the ‘sun, moon and stars’ of venues for the ceremony. You want to know about the top of the top of honeymoons, read on.  For me, this was the SUPER BOWL of weddings. The media made it front page news. This book is a good start since this wedding was a “10”, to which all brides-to-be might aspire. Ideas might start here!

THE AUTHOR: Carrie Hayward

Hayward is a writer and has done editing for many years.  She is a great fan of Disney – parks and cruses. She understands that they are a great destination for many people, particularly those just married. She aspired to have her very own ceremony in the Walt Disney World in Orlando, Fla. Having done it, she decided to compile a book to help others: weddings and honeymoons combined. She and her husband visit often to keep current about Disney matters. Their  family business is  the publisher.

Several books of the series are:

  • Passporter’s Festivals and Celebrations at Walt Disney World
  • PassPorter’s Walt Disney World for British Holidaymakers
  • Passporter’s Disney Weddings & Honeymoons
  • Passporter’s Disney Vacation Club Guide: For Members and Members-to-be

THE BOOK: “PassPorter’s Disney Weddings and Honeymoons: Dream Days at Disney World and on Disney Cruises” [Paperback] by Carrie Hayward

Hayward is giving you a combo guidebook and wedding organizer all-in-one.  Why is it on Walt Disney World in Orlando Florida? This is because it hosts 2500 + weddings each year. Disney truly knows weddings.  The Chapters are: 1) Memories collection; 2) Escape collection; 3) Wishes; 4) Couture collection; 5) Addititional events; 6)  Everything else; 7) Disney cruise collection; 8) Honeymoons & anniversaries at Walt Disney World;  and 9) Planning pages. The collections are holiday levels with escalating price points. It covers: (a) Prices;  (b) Contracts;  (c) Locations; (d) Food; (e) Decor; (f) Entertainment; (g) Photography; (h) Transportation;  etc. If Disney is your thing, check it out. It will be useful for brides-to-be. Just a further important note, this title is independent of Disney and a part of a series. Pictures are inlcuded.


This is about a young girl’s dream and her journey, (on getting engaged), becoming a bride-to-be, then a  bride and if they’re lucky, a mother of the bride or groom.  In a word, it is delightful! This is also about doing a wedding right!

Personal comments
For a young girl, her wedding is HER very own big day- it is her ultimate coming out party! As you might know, most brides prefer June or September for weddings.  In my cultural community, the preparation for a wedding starts at least a year in advance.  There are many choices to be made. Knowing what you want makes a big difference.  By the time  the wedding day comes around, the people in the bridal party are exhausted. 

Is it smart to spend a lot of money for a wedding? No,  it should be within reason, an affordable sum.  Or it depends. If it’s for a marriage which will be for a lifetime, I would agree.  But, unfortunately, no one knows this in advance.  For some people, spending more is right. They want a beautiful church or other venue for the ceremony, the best hall with a wedding gown of $500 or $1000 or more, a feast soup-to-nuts … sweet table included and also a 3+ piece band. I know of those who took  out a second mortgage to pay for their child’s wedding.  Although, I am very wary of borrowing, I understand their thinking.  

I also want to make the point that the size of your change purse will not determine the elegance level of your future nuptials. I believe that  you need to determine your budget; and once done, then prioritize. If the huge affair is not desired or doable, consider a new cocktail dress to make you the prettiest ‘belle’ at the ball. Select an outside garden for the intimate ceremony-immediate family limited. Give all attendees a disposable camera. Ask a friend with a video cam to record the ceremony (and as much of the reception that he or she could do and still enjoy the festivities). I encourage you to hire a local cellist or flutist for 2 hours – the music will be the finishing touch to complete the beauty of the scene. Make the reception a weekday cocktail party (or a Sunday brunch) for family and close friends. One option is to rent a hall and pile on high the breads and coldcuts and home-prepared salads (e.g., potato, slaw, noodle, fruit, etc.) Don’t forget 4l +- boxes of wine both red and white – ask your liquor store clerk for one that is from your own country, is good, but sold at a  moderate cost. Or choose a great FAMILY-style restaurant in your home town – it should have a warm decor and be known for great food …plentiful portions please – I never want guests to go home hungry! Bake your own cake and place disposable cameras on the tables, asking one and all to snap away, starting as soon as they arrive, ending when they leave.  Finally, on the topic of musicmakers, bring your sound system to the venue.  After planning the variety of CDs, ask friends to bring the favorites of the couple to be married. If someone has a Karaoke, ask him or her to bring it along as well. Don’t forget a few small gifts for those who helped with the above. And after all of this, party on!

The point

I want each young woman to have HER day; it should be extra-special!

Every bride- to- be should:

 1. Do their homework – this means research: magazines, Internet, asking for recommendations, etc.; this is to eliminate days going from store- to- store, much too much legwork for a busy bride- to- be .

2. Make sure that you know what you want – so that the end results will be what your heart desires;
3. Plan a wedding WITHIN your means – don’t go into debt! 
4. Accept any offer of financial assistance from your parents and/or future in-laws; this is not about pride – it is to get a head start into life!
5. Plan as much as you can in advance; so that you won’t be overwhelmed near the date of the wedding.
Heavy lifting
6. Consider a wedding organizer; but If you can’t afford one, then you’re on your own:
7. Reserve your date for the ceremony; and select the wedding party: maid/matron of honor and best man, bridesmaids, ushers, flower girl, ring bearer, etc.;  
8. Make a reservation EARLY at your preferred reception hall; in this regard;
9.1 Think about the quality of the hall: appearance, elegance level and first and foremost the food: (i). cocktail party fonger foods (ors d’oeuvres; (ii).meal; (iii). sweet table; (b) drinks; (c) wine and sparkling wine;
9.2 Think about hotel room availability for the bridal couple and out of towners, etc.
10. Buy the wedding gown – consider traditional yet stylish: strapless.
11. Engage the band – the music makers make the party;
12. Hire the photographer: stills, video, etc.- check out his past catalogue.
13. Book the florist: flowers, centrepeices, etc.- look for someone recommended.
14. Choose the baker and the wedding cake – usually the hall does this too!
15. Order the invitations – I think that they should be as cheap as you can get because they go into the garbage. 
16. Consider a limousine service – it adds to the glitz and makes the day even more special!
17. Remember the male formal wear; encourage the groom and friends to go asap. 
18. Book the honeymoon: flight, hotel, cruise, rental car, etc. (Don’t forget your passport (N.B. It must not have expired!)
19. Decide upon the seating plan; you will probably have to be a diplomat finessing parents, future inlaws, frineds, etc.;
20. Buy the gifts for the bridal partyas well as “bonbonnières” for the guests (guest giveaway)
21. Note that last minute details will take up a lot of your time – get ready and be prepared!
22. Enjoy the day and cherish the memories.  
23. Know what is appropriate as a gift if an invited guest to a wedding. If at their turn, the family goes all out and the event is bigger than big,  one should endeavor to be quite generous. According to our custom, most give $300.00+ a couple in a ‘busta’ (envelope with card).  At least, that is the custom in our Italian community.    

If you ask me, I say: “I do …, or more correctly, I did … a wedding, that is; now it’s your turn! Congratulations and have a great day!

Take it out for a spin and tell me if you agree.

And that’s my thought of the week on books, what’s yours? *
“Books are life; and they make life better!*”
-Web Tech:

The above is a new media production of Valente under its “United Author*” program.

*TM/© 2011 Practitioners’ Press Inc. – All Rights Reserved.
Schedule I


For today, my word/phrase(s) are: “weddings”; “wedding gown”; “wedding planner”; etc.
“A wedding is the ceremony in which two people are united in marriage or a similar institution. Wedding traditions and customs vary greatly between cultures, ethnic groups, religions, countries, and social classes. Most wedding ceremonies involve an exchange of wedding vows by the couple, presentation of a gift (offering, ring(s), symbolic item, flowers, money), and a public proclamation of marriage by an authority figure or leader. Special wedding garments are often worn, and the ceremony is sometimes followed by a wedding reception. Music, poetry, prayers or readings from Scripture or literature are also optionally incorporated into the ceremony.”
(Source: Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia) –

Wedding Gown
“A wedding dress or wedding gown is the clothing worn by a bride during a wedding ceremony. Color, style and ceremonial importance of the gown can depend on the religion and culture of the wedding participants.”
(Source: Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia) –
Wedding planner
“[1] is a professional who assists with planning and organization of weddings. Weddings are significant events in people’s lives, and those involved are often willing to spend a considerable amount of money to ensure it is organized as perfectly as possible.[2] Professional wedding planners exist in several countries[3] and communities[4], with extensive certification courses available to those who wish to pursue the career.Some wedding planners charge either a fraction (perhaps 5-10%) of total the wedding cost, (which can range between $20,000 to $2 million in relatively affluent communities in USA) or a flat fee[5]. in USA the fees typically range between $1500 to $5000[6] depending on the services provided. However, wedding industry statistics, including ranges and averages for wedding planner fees, are generated and promoted by commercial interests and are considered unreliable by unbiased sources.”

S & R* BONUS FACT * #1: Wedding types
“Below are several types and styles of weddings. A wedding may include several of these aspects.
[edit] Civil wedding
A civil wedding is a ceremony presided over by a local civil authority, such as an elected or appointed judge, Justice of the Peace or the mayor of a locality. Civil wedding ceremonies may use references to God or a deity (except in UK law), but generally no references to a particular religion or denomination. They can be either elaborate or simple. Many civil wedding ceremonies take place in local town or city halls or courthouses in judges’ chambers.

[edit] Elopement
Eloping is the act of getting married, often unexpectedly, without inviting guests to the wedding. In some cases a small group of family and/or friends may be present, while in others, the engaged couple may marry without the consent and/or knowledge of parents or others. While the couple may or may not be widely known to be engaged prior to the elopement, the wedding itself is generally a surprise to those who are later informed of its occurrence.

[edit] Same-sex wedding
A same-sex or same-gender wedding is a ceremony in which two people of the same sex are married. This event may be legally documented as a marriage or another legally recognized partnership such as a civil union. Where such partnerships are not legally recognized, the wedding may be a religious or symbolic ceremony designed to provide an opportunity to make the same public declarations and celebration with friends and family that any other type of wedding may afford. These are often referred to as “commitment ceremonies.

Officiants at same-sex weddings may be religiously ordained. Many religions and branches of religions, including Quakers, Unitarians, Ethical Culture, Reform and Reconstructionist Jews, the Metropolitan Community Church, and the Reformed Catholic Church perform and recognize same-sex marriages, even if the government of their geographic area may not.

[edit] Destination wedding
Not to be confused with an elopement, a destination wedding is one in which a wedding is hosted, often in a vacation-like setting, at a location to which most of the invited guests must travel and often stay for several days. This could be a beach ceremony in the tropics, a lavish event in a metropolitan resort, or a simple ceremony at the home of a geographically distant friend or relative. During the recession of 2009, destination weddings continued to see growth compared to traditional weddings, as the typically smaller size results in lower costs.[17]

[edit] White wedding
Main article: White wedding
A white wedding is a term for a traditional formal or semi-formal Western wedding. This term refers to the color of the wedding dress, which became popular after Queen Victoria wore a pure white gown when she married Prince Albert, and many were quick to copy her choice. At the time, the color white to many symbolized both extravagance and sexual purity, and had become the color for use by girls of the royal court.[1] Though white no longer symbolizes the same ideas today, the color remains the most popular choice for first time brides in the west.

[edit] Weekend wedding
A weekend wedding is a wedding in which couples and their guests celebrate over the course of an entire weekend. Special activities, such as spa treatments and golf tournaments may be scheduled into the wedding itinerary.Lodging usually is at the same facility as the wedding and couples often host a Sunday brunch for the weekend’s finale.

[edit] Military wedding
A military wedding is a ceremony conducted in a military chapel and may involve a Saber Arch. In most military weddings the groom, bride, or both (depending on which is a member of the armed services) will wear a military dress uniform in lieu of civilian formal wear, although military dress uniforms largely serve the same purpose. Some retired military personnel who marry after their service has ended may opt for a military wedding.

[edit] Double wedding
A double wedding is a single ceremony where two affianced couples rendezvous for two simultaneous or consecutive weddings. Typically, a fiancé with a
sibling who is also engaged, or four close friends in which both couples within the friendship are engaged might plan a double wedding where both couples legally marry.

[edit] Mass wedding
A mass wedding is a single ceremony where numerous couples are married simultaneously.”
(Source: Wikipedia the free encyclopedia)b-

S & R* BONUS FACT #2: Common elements across cultures
“A number of cultures have adopted the traditional Western custom of the white wedding, in which a bride wears a white wedding dress and veil. This tradition was popularized through the wedding of Queen Victoria. Some say Victoria’s choice of a white gown may have simply been a sign of extravagance, but may have also been influenced by the values she held which emphasized sexual purity.[1] Within the modern ‘white wedding’ tradition, a white dress and veil are unusual choices for a woman’s second or subsequent wedding. The notion that a white gown might symbolize sexual purity has been long abandoned, and is criticized by etiquette writers like Judith Martin as distasteful.[2] The use of a wedding ring has long been part of religious weddings in Europe and America, but the origin of the tradition is unclear. Historians like Vicki Howard point out that belief in the “ancient” quality of the practice are most likely a modern invention.[3] “Double ring” ceremonies are also a modern practice, a groom’s wedding band not appearing in the United States until the early 20th century.[4] The wedding is often followed by a reception, in which the rituals may include toasting the newlyweds, their first dance as spouses, and the cutting of a wedding cake.”
(Source: Wikipedia the free encyclopedia) –

Schedule II
STUDY/STATISTICS: “How Many Trips Do We Take Down the Aisle? by Rose Kreider, Family Demographer, US Census Bureau Fertility & Family Statistics Branch

“Most of us take only one trip down the aisle. Among all currently married couples in 2009, 72 percent were made up of a man and woman who were each in their first marriage. Looking only at recently married couples, which gives us an idea of current patterns, 65 percent of couples who married during 2008 were in their first marriage.

At the other end of the spectrum, a small percentage, just 1 percent, of currently married couples consisted of a husband and wife who had both been married three or more times. Another 6 percent of currently married couples included one spouse who was in at least their third marriage. Between these extremes, 22 percent of currently married couples included at least one spouse who was in their second marriage.

Couples who got married during 2008 looked similar, with 25 percent including at least one spouse who was in their second marriage and a slightly higher 9 percent including one spouse in their third or higher order marriage.

More detail about how many times adults have married and other information on the marital history of Americans is available in a report released today by the U.S. Census Bureau titled Number, Timing and Duration of Marriages and Divorces: 2009.”

Source: U.S. Census – stats –

Schedule III

S & R* NEWS ALERT* #1: Design the wedding of your dreams even on a budget

“(NC)—You’ve dreamed about your wedding day, but not about the price tag that comes along with it. Luckily, you can have the wedding of your dreams on a realistic budget with a little creativity. Here are two inexpensive projects for a day that you – and your guests – will never forget.
The Centre of It All

When it comes to your reception décor, you want your guest tables to shine. However, lush floral centrepieces can quickly consume your budget.

Sometimes the simplest centrepiece can be the most elegant. Try a glass container filled with coloured stones, water and floating candles or flowers. Another option is a wine bottle centrepiece. Collect empty bottles (be sure to enlist some help) for each table and spray paint each in your wedding colours. Add embellishments by stenciling or adding photos, quotes or graphics that represent your relationship.

Who Doesn’t Love Candy

Give your guests a fun treat with an inviting (and inexpensive) candy buffet. First, select a variety of glass jars and containers in different sizes and shapes to hold your treats. Don’t stop here though. There are a variety of ways to further embellish your candy jars.
“For a wedding candy buffet, adding colours and embellishments adds depth to the glass,” says Katherine Merkle, Krylon brand manager. “This gives your table a more sophisticated look that doesn’t have to come with an expensive price tag.”

Start by washing the containers and allowing them to dry thoroughly. Next, use stencils to spray the outside of your containers with anything from stripes and polka dots to glitter with a paint such as Krylon’s Indoor/Outdoor spray paint or Glitter spray. You can also use a leafing pen to add additional details. Other decorating options include glitter, decoupage or stencils.

For set up, use a variety of sturdy boxes or books stacked at varied heights and then drape a tablecloth over the levels. Place your containers and fill each with your festively coloured and delicious treats.

These projects are just two simple ways you can create the wedding of your dreams without breaking the bank. Additional project ideas from Krylon can be found online at”
( –

S & R* NEWS ALERT* #2: Meaningful wedding favours that last

“(NC)—Edible bonbonnières are always a popular wedding favour at receptions. In fact, sometimes that beautifully wrapped bag of candy coated almonds or chocolates are eaten on the spot, depending on what time dinner is served.

Meanwhile, bonbonnières of the non–edible variety sometimes consist of little trinkets and heart–shaped keychains that you never use. Instead, you add it to the collection you’ve accumulated on a dusty shelf, along with other items you never touch.

This time, it’s your turn to get hitched, and you and your spouse–to–be are wondering if wedding favours are really worth the cost.

For a meaningful gift that will show appreciation to your guests and have a lasting impact, consider making a charitable donation in their honour. Charities like Christian Children’s Fund of Canada have an online gift catalogue where you can purchase fruit trees, clean water wells, insecticide–treated malaria nets, and medical supplies for a clinic in developing countries. As you and your spouse–to–be happily start your lives together, take pride in making life a little easier for others around the world who are in need.”  –

*TM/© 2011 Practitioners’ Press Inc. – All Rights Reserved.

Posted by on June 12th, 2011 Comments Off on “BRIDE’S WEDDING PLANNING/ PLANNER: I give you motherly advice, how-to, dos and don’ts

“FATHER’S DAY: I love you Dad, yesterday, today and forever!*”

Vol. 2,  No. 5, June 5, 2011

TITLE: “FATHER’S DAY: I love you Dad, yesterday, today and forever!”


Now that Father’s Day is approaching, I am thinking about my Dad. My book of the week is: “A Father’s Day Thank You” by Janet Nolan. Hence my topic of the week is this special day.


Father’s Day was special for my family.  My mother taught my brothers and me that this was the day to show our respect and love for our Dad. (She was a great example as she in turn, showed her loving respect for her father on this day.)  We always celebrated Father’s Day.  My mother would make a special lunch and bake one of our favorite cakes.  My brothers and I would buy gifts. While he didn’t expect anything, Dad’s reaction was always a combination of pleasant surprise, gratitude and appreciation.

My Dad was a very special person and a wonderful father.  His wife and children were his priority.  He was a VERY hard worker and a great provider – his aim was to ensure that we had all the opportunity that life had to offer. He encouraged us to love knowledge and be curious. He said that it was important to have goals. He showed by example: “Work hard and do your best”!. He taught us to strive to better ourselves: 1) Get an education; 2) Get a job and excel and build a career; 3) Buy and  own real estate; 4) Save for a better life.  He also taught us to have fun and balance in our lives.

S & R* CHOICE ANECDOTAGE #1: Father’s Day Gift
“As part of a Father’s Day gift in June 2001, Sharon Stone and her husband, San Francisco Chronicle editor Phil Bronstein, visited a Komodo dragon at the Los Angeles Zoo. Lest the Komodo mistake his foot for a mouse, Bronstein was advised to remove his white sneakers. No sooner had he doffed his protective footwear than the Komodo bit him on the toe. “He was so brave,” Stone later declared. “In the 21st century, a woman doesn’t often see her knight fight off a real dragon!”
(Source: –

S & R* CHOICE ANECDOTAGE #2:Robin Williams: Box Office Poison
“At the 2005 Golden Globe Awards, Robin Williams was appraoched by “Extra” host Mark McGrath. “We did a movie back in ’95 together,” McGrath remarked. “It was called Father’s Day.” “I remember now,” Williams said with a nod. “My phone hasn’t rung,” said McGrath. Robin’s reply? “Neither has mine!”
(Source: –

S & R* (DOUBLE) QUOTE #1: William Shakespeare

S & R* QUOTE #2: John F. Kennedy
“My father always told me that all businessmen were sons of bitches, but I never believed it till now.”
(Source: Wisdom Quotes) –

S & R* QUOTE #3: Sigmund Freud
“I cannot think of any need in childhood as strong as the need for a father’s protection.”
(Source: Wisdom Quotes) –

THE AUTHOR: Janet Nolan

Nolan is a children’s picture book author. She likes what she does. She says that she came upon it unexpectedly She is creative. She likes conceiving of and developing characters, backgrounds and story lines.

She graduated with a B.A. from Evergreen State College in Olympia, Washington, and a master’s degree in Urban Planning and Policy from the University of Illinois at Chicago. She currently is the Program Co-Chair for the Illinois chapter of the Society of Children’s Book Writers and Illustrators (SCBWI). She lives in Oak Park, Illinois.


Ember lives on a Pennsylvania farm. She loves animals, knowing them first hand. They are the subject of her art. Examples can be found in greeting cards, puzzles, wllpaper to name a few.  In “A Father’s Day Thank You” by Janet Nolan, she uses her gift to create charming cub like adorables. They are perfect with Nolan’s prose. They do the trick!

Nolan is the author of:

  • The Firehouse Light 
  • A Father’s Day Thank You  
  • The St. Patrick’s Day Shillelagh  

BOOK: A Father’s Day Thank You by Janet Nolan

Father’s Day is the occasion. Harvey is one of three children (cubs). There is a question about the right gift for Dad on Father’s Day. In years gone by, they bought the same gift (e.g., ties, a box of nails, golf balls, etc.) and he always loves it ,,,repeatedly asking for more.  This year he decides upon the perfect gift. Recognizing everything his father does: helping him after a fall, flat tire on his bike, reading a bedtime story, etc. Dad is handy in the kitchen – he knows how to cook breakfast; etc.  Putting crayon to paper is the priceless gift appropriate for the special father that he has. One of the visual images- the color is striking,   (Illustration by Ms Ember), shows the scene of a father at a desklike table and mother fugure entering the room with a gift wrapped present. There is a dog wagging his table to add to the tranquility of the scene.

The message is right. Being in a family with a Dad is good. Being a Dad that is loving is great!
It’s not only about the gift to buy, but also what you can make. The thought is most important. Saying thank you on Father’s Day is very good!

While the book’s level  is PreSchool-Grade 2, the sweetness and innocence is also enchanting for adults reading the story to their offspring.


One of our commandments is:  “Honor your father and your mother”.   It’s important to make a big deal over your father on this day.  It’s when one can officially pay respect to Dad.  With our busy schedules, we sometimes forget to express how we feel and sometimes we take things for granted.  It’s the day when we can say, “Dad, you are special and I appreciate everything you do for me.”

Personal comments

Taking the time to celebrate your father is good. His main concern is to do right for his family.  Know that you are lucky to have him. Recognize all that he does, from things small al the way to big, all great and wonderful nonetheless. Give thanks for the blessing.

The point

This is the day for father. Every other is your day at his hand.  Like your Dad, my Dad deserved and continues to deserve to be respected on this special day. It has been five years since he passed away and every Father’s Day, I light a candle in his honor.  Seize the moment and give tribute to your father.


1. Make Father’s day a special day for your Dad;
2. Go with Dad and play one of  his favorite activities like golf;
3. Put some thought in the gift that you will buy;
4. Tell your Dad how much you care and appreciate him;
5. Don’t wait for this day; but instead, 
5.1 Pay your respects each and every day;
5,2 Visit your Dad often;
6. Make Father’s day a holiday to enjoy and spend quality time with him;
7. Mark the day if he has passed on by
7.1 Wearing the tie belonging to him in your closet, regardless if it’s the green one for St Patrick’s Day;
7.2 Smelling the pungent aroma from a bottle of the after shave that he used to use;
7.3 Playing with one of his golf balls displayed yearlong in your glass bowl; and
7.4  Recall your wonderful memories.

This Father’s day, I plan to remember the days gone by, smiling but sad at the same time, and while gazing at the candle flickering.I will raise my glass, and say: Salut!   

Take it out for a spin and tell me if you agree.

And that’s my thought of the week on books, what’s yours? *
“Books are life; and they make life better!*”
-Web Tech:

The above is a new media production of Valente under its “United Author*” program.

*TM/© 2011 Practitioners’ Press Inc. – All Rights Reserved.
Schedule I

For today, my word/phrase(s) are: “Father’s Day”; “”; “”; etc.
“Father’s Day”
“Father’s Day is a celebration honoring fathers and celebrating fatherhood, paternal bonds, and the influence of fathers in society. It is celebrated on the third Sunday of June in many countries and on other days elsewhere. It complements Mother’s Day, the celebration honoring mothers.”
(Source: Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia) –’s_Day

S & R* BONUS FACT * #1: Father’s day
“Father’s Day is a celebration of fathers inaugurated in the early twentieth century to complement Mother’s Day in celebrating fatherhood and male parenting. It is also celebrated to honor and commemorate our forefathers[citation needed]. Father’s Day is celebrated on a variety of dates worldwide and typically involves gift-giving, special dinners to fathers, and family-oriented activities.Long before any modern observances, a young Babylonian named Elmesu wished his father good health and a long life on a clay tablet. The Catholic
observance was originally on March 19, St. Joseph’s Day. On June 19, 1910, an independently-invented Father’s Day observance was celebrated through the efforts of Sonora Smart Dodd of Spokane, Washington. After listening to a church sermon at Spokane’s Central Methodist Episcopal Church in 1909 about the newly recognized Mother’s Day, Dodd felt strongly that fatherhood needed recognition, as well.[1] She wanted a celebration that honored fathers like her own father, William Smart, a Civil War veteran who was left to raise his family alone when his wife died giving birth to their sixth child when Sonora was 16 years old.[2]The following year with the assistance of Reverend Dr. Conrad Bluhm, her pastor at Old Centenary Presbyterian Church (now Knox Presbyterian Church), Sonora took the idea to the Spokane YMCA. The Spokane YMCA, along with the Ministerial Alliance, endorsed Dodd’s idea and helped it spread by celebrating the first Father’s Day in 1910. Sonora suggested her father’s birthday, June 5, be established as the day to honor all Fathers. However, the pastors wanted more time to prepare, so on June 19, 1910, young members of the YMCA went to church wearing roses: a red rose to honor a living father, and a white rose to honor a deceased one.[2] Dodd traveled through the city in a horse-drawn carriage, carrying gifts to shut-in fathers confined indoors by illness.[2] It took many years to make the holiday official. In spite of support from the YWCA, the YMCA, and churches, Father’s Day ran the risk of disappearing from the calendar.[3] Where Mother’s Day was met with enthusiasm, Father’s Day was often met with laughter.[3] The holiday was gathering attention slowly, but for the wrong reasons. It was the target of much satire, parody and derision, including jokes from the local newspaper Spokesman-Review.[3] Many people saw it as the first step in filling the calendar with mindless promotions.[3] A bill to accord national recognition of the holiday was introduced in Congress in 1913.[4] In 1916, President Woodrow Wilson went to Spokane to speak in a Father’s Day celebration and wanted to make it official, but Congress resisted, fearing that it would become commercialized.[2] US President Calvin Coolidge recommended in 1924 that the day be observed by the nation, but stopped short of issuing a national proclamation. Two earlier attempts to formally recognize the holiday had been defeated by Congress.[5] In 1957, Maine Senator Margaret Chase Smith wrote a proposal accusing Congress of ignoring fathers for 40 years while honoring mothers, thus “[singling] out just one of our two parents”[5] In 1966, President Lyndon B. Johnson issued the first presidential proclamation honoring fathers, designating the third Sunday in June as Father’s Day.[2] Six years later, the day was made a permanent national holiday when President Richard Nixon signed it into law in 1972.[2][5]In 2010, the Father’s Day Centennial Celebration[6] occurs in Spokane with a month of events commemorating the day.In addition to Father’s Day, International Men’s Day is celebrated in many countries on November 19 for men and boys who are not fathers.”
(Source: Wikipedia the free encyclopedia) –’s_Day

S & R* BONUS FACT #2: Observance of Father’s day

“Contrary to popular belief, the first observance of Father’s Day actually took place in Fairmont, West Virginia on July 5, 1908. It was organized by Mrs. Grace Golden Clayton, who wanted to celebrate the lives of the 210 fathers who had been lost in the Monongah Mining disaster several months earlier in Monongah, West Virginia, on December 6, 1907. It’s possible that Clayton was influenced by the first celebration of Mother’s Day that same year, just a few miles away. Clayton chose the Sunday nearest to the birthday of her recently deceased father. Unfortunately, the day was overshadowed by other events in the city, West Virginia did not officially register the holiday, and it was not celebrated again. All the credit for Father’s Day went to Sonora Dodd, who invented independently her own celebration of Father’s Day just two years later, also influenced by Jarvis’ Mother’s Day.Clayton’s celebration was forgotten until 1972, when one of the attendants to the celebration saw Nixon’s proclamation of Father’s Day, and worked to recover its legacy. The celebration is now held every year in the Central United Methodist Church — the Williams Memorial Methodist Episcopal Church, South, was torn down in 1922. Fairmont is now promoted as the “Home of the First Father’s Day Service”.[7]”
(Source: Wikipedia the free encyclopedia) –’s_Day
Schedule II

STUDY/STATISTICS: Father’s Day: June 19, 2011
“The idea of Father’s Day was conceived slightly more than a century ago by Sonora Dodd of Spokane, Wash., while she listened to a Mother’s Day sermon in 1909. Dodd wanted a special day to honor her father, William Smart, a widowed Civil War veteran who was left to raise his six children on a farm. A day in June was chosen for the first Father’s Day celebration — 101 years ago, June 19, 1910, proclaimed by Spokane’s mayor because it was the month of Smart’s birth. The first presidential proclamation honoring fathers was issued in 1966 when President Lyndon Johnson designated the third Sunday in June as Father’s Day. Father’s Day has been celebrated annually since 1972 when President Richard Nixon signed the public law that made it permanent.”

How Many Fathers?

70.1 million
Estimated number of fathers across the nation.
Source: Unpublished data from the Survey of Income and Program Participation

25.3 million

Number of fathers who were part of married-couple families with children younger than 18 in 2010.
•22 percent were raising three or more children younger than 18 (among married-couple family households only).
•3 percent lived in someone else’s home.
Source: America’s Families and Living Arrangements>

1.8 million
Number of single fathers in 2010; 15 percent of single parents were men.
•Nine percent were raising three or more children younger than 18.
•About 46 percent were divorced, 30 percent were never married, 19 percent were separated, and 6 percent were widowed.
•39 percent had an annual family income of $50,000 or more.
Source: America’s Families and Living Arrangements
U.S. Census – stats –

Schedule III

S & R* NEWS ALERT* #1: What Canadians are giving for Father’s Day

“For the 42 per cent of Canadians who definitely or probably will buy a Father’s Day gift this year, the days leading up to June 19th can leave shoppers scratching their heads. For those still stumped for gift ideas, a recent survey conducted by men’s grooming brand, Gillette, sheds some light on what Canadians will be wrapping up this year. The traditional father’s day gift “ the necktie“ is always a popular choice as 42 per cent of Canadians are planning to give some sort of apparel for Father’ s Day. If you’re giving a necktie, put a modern spin on it. Says Brett Fahlgren, GQ style correspondent. A tie that has a thinner width instantly updates the classic shirt and tie look, and don’t be afraid to play with bold patterns and colours. Grooming gifts will be popular this year with 24 per cent of Canadians choosing them for Dad. One idea is to give a Gillette Fusion ProGlide gift pack. In this pack you get the ProGlide razor, Hydra Gel shave gel, and a cleanser that exfoliates and heats up on contact with water“ Gillette Fusion ProSeries Thermal Face Scrub.As other gifting holidays, tech devices are always a popular gift and 32 per cent of Canadians plan to choose one for Father’s Day. From cameras, to music players to GPS navigation systems, technology gifts offer almost limitless gift idea possibilities. No matter whether or not a Father’s Day gift is given, or how big or how small it is, the old adage remains true“ it’s the thought that counts.”

S & R* NEWS ALERT* #2: Father’s Day gifts for grandfathers By Melissa Yue
”If you think dads feel neglected after years of forgotten Father’s Day fanfare, grandfathers feel it even more. Every Mother’s Day, we lavish our mothers and grandmothers with heartfelt cards and flowers, but when Father’s Day rolls around, we hardly remember to call. Though most men will often shrug that it’s no big deal, you’ve vowed to make things better this year. Get inspired with these gift ideas:

Quality time with you. Most grandfathers would prefer spending time with their loved ones to a cheesy joke card and #1 grandpa tie. Tear out a page from your day planner and literally give your whole day to grandpa, participating in his favourite activities like fishing or birdwatching. Or buy tickets to watch a concert, movie, standup comic, or sports event together.

Donate in his honour. Show your appreciation to your grandfather and all the ways he helped to shape you into who you’ve become. Charities like Christian Children’s Fund of Canada ( offer valuable gift items like fruit trees, mosquito nets, clean water wells, and business loans to help struggling families overseas. You can customize a card for your grandpa and show him how his generosity inspired you to help others.

Mp3 player. Rummage through his old vinyl records and cassette tapes and find matching mp3s to load onto a player. Then show grandpa how to use his new gadget so he can enjoy music he loves on “the“go.

Photo gifts. Load all your favourite photos of children and grandchildren into a digital picture frame. Or frame a collage print of your favourite memories for display.

Your grandfather is probably not expecting anything from you, but a simple gift can touch his heart and will show him how much his support has meant to you.

S & R* NEWS ALERT* #???:

New fathers will qualify for almost six months’ paid paternity leave under controversial plans to be unveiled by ministers today.The shake-up will see the standard paternity leave offered to fathers extended from two weeks to six. But under radical plans for ‘shared’ parental leave, fathers could then take a further seven months off if the mother goes back to work early. All but the last three months would be paid.The plans, first championed by Nick Clegg in the Mail in January, will allow parents to take their leave in ‘chunks’ of a few weeks or months at a time – despite warnings that it would be hugely disruptive for business.The changes go even further than those pushed through by Labour’s Harriet Harman under the previous government. But they have been labelled a ‘nightmare’ by some business groups.Business Secretary Vince Cable and Home Secretary Theresa May will today condemn Britain’s existing maternity leave rules as ‘old-fashioned, inflexible and gender-biased’. They say ministers want fathers to be able to spend more time with their young children so they will ‘no longer have to choose between a rewarding career and a fulfilling home and personal life’.”
(Source:  Google News Alerts) –

S & R* NEWS ALERT* #???:

Being a parent is hard work; there is near universal agreement on that.Now a new study from Ohio State University indicates that when fathers handle some of the parenting duties like diapers and fixing dinner, it can sometimes lead to more conflict.Time magazine looked at the Ohio State study, which examined the roles of both parents in 112 families. The gist was that when the father stuck to playing with the kids, the parents had a better ‘co-parenting’ relationship than when dad got involved in hands-on care like helping with baths and brushing of teeth.In recent decades, we’ve probably all heard the reports that mothers wanted more help from fathers when it came to the kids. This study seems to raise some questions about what kind of help mothers really want.”Are moms power-hungry? Or are they just stuck in their ways, which for ages have placed the mother at the center of the home, as the primary caregiver and molder of children? “With one in college and one headed there this fall, there are no such arguments in my home. But when they were younger, I do remember feeling that the vast majority of the bathing, tooth-brushing, meal preparation, etc., fell to me — and to most of the other mothers of young children I knew at work, school, church and in the neighborhood.As I was driving to work one morning this week, the radio personalities started discussing this study. The men mostly said that when they handled hair-combing or dinner duty, they got second-guessed.In your experience, do moms want more hands-on help from dads when it comes to the chores, or do they want the dads to stick to play time? How has it worked in your family? Or do you wish you could go back in time and change up the division of duties you had when your children were younger?
(Source:  Google News Alerts) –
*TM/© 2011 Practitioners’ Press Inc. – All Rights Reserved.

Posted by on June 5th, 2011 Comments Off on “FATHER’S DAY: I love you Dad, yesterday, today and forever!*”